I’m not Jeff Foxworthy but some things about being health impaired are so ridiculous, we might as well try to laugh. Here are a few I thought of along with some additions from my Spoonie friends. Please share yours in the comments section for Invisible Illness Awareness Week!
You Know You’re a Spoonie When:
-You have more cute socks and pajamas than sexy lingerie’ and heels.
-You are on a first name basis with all of the local pharmacists.
-Your family uses YOU as their excuse for getting out of things they don’t want to do with other people.
-If a stranger comes to your front door, you just hide until they go away.
-You have more salts in your bathroom than the DMV road crews in the winter.
-Your spouse/partner fills your meds for you as a romantic gesture of his/her affection (goodbye flowers!).
-You have become mysteriously artsy/crafty over time since diagnosis (was increased creativity one of your symptoms?).
-Your doctors and favorite nurses are on your Christmas card list.
-You know where all the elevators are wherever you go, yet somehow they always end up super far away from your actual destination (what is that about anyway??).
-Your pets seem to have a better understanding about how you are feeling than anyone else.
-Your loved ones have a favorite joke about your disability that makes you laugh. When they say it in public, people think your loved ones are horrible.
-You have more hair in your bed, in the drain, and in your brush today than is actually on your head!
-You start to talk to your Spoonie friends online more than you talk to your friends and family.
-You’ve learned so much about medicine that your doctors talk to you like a colleague instead of a patient.
-You’ve developed heightened super-sonic senses. You’re sure you are a super hero and keep looking for a lit up spoon signal outside. (To the sick cave!)
From my Spoonie friends: You know you’re a Spoonie When…
-All the people who work at the drug store and pharmacy know you and your family by name. -Molly Williams
-Whenever you are in public people stare. You are starting to get a complex that you have grown extremely good looking. inspired by –Living Life Beyond Disability
-You joke about going to see your “drug dealer” a.k.a. your pharmacist. -April Hughs
-When I rate my pain 1-10 and 7 means I’m having a GOOD day. -Keely Blackburn
-You know all the different medications and their side effects. -Julie Pierpoint
-You have to bite your tongue when a friend keeps complaining about his/her allergies. inspired by –Sick and Sick of it
-You talk to your doctors, nurses, and pharmacists more than you talk to your own family! -Allisin Wonderland Hatfield
-Your deaf and blind dog thinks your crutches are trying to attack him! -Tegan Bert
-You go to hand your pharmacist the prescription card and she says “Nah, I remember you have one of those.” -Christine Brannon-Miles
-You make fun of the television commercials about medications that “help” symptoms like yours. inspired by –Finding Out Fibro
-When your mum says you will never get a flu because all of your meds will probably knock it out of your system first. -Marika Dolinski
-You use ferocious animals and monsters to represent your illness. –inspired by Elle and the Auto Gnome
-You are so tired of explaining what’s wrong with you that when anyone asks, you distract them by responding: “where did you get your hair cut?” or “do you garden?” -Melanie Barker
What are yours?
If you enjoyed the above poster or want to know what a “Spoonie” is, read the article it was based on: “10,000 Spoons, If Only! Why the Chronically Ill Love Spoons”
This article was featured on InvisibleIllnessWeek.com 2014. Sharing again here in honor of Invisible Illness Week 2015.